Caroling Around the Crib

"Servants of the Lord, 

Bless the Lord."

- Daniel 3:85

      It was the night before the last day of student teaching and all throughout the Rotunda could be heard the sounds of songs from The Sound of Music. I was seated next to a beautiful woman of God awaiting the arrival of my three friends and Baby Jesus. Throughout the Rotunda came more friends chattering about in the spirit of Advent and hustling and bustling about the end (of the semester) being near. Wait. What?! Of course, one would be confused if he or she wasn't standing there at that exact moment. So let me give you the background...

      A few weeks before the end of the semester, an email went out to the Senior class asking for submissions of essays of those wishing to carry Baby Jesus on Carol Night. I remembered back to my Freshmen year, while working with Sister Cathy, going into the VP's office to get the new baby Jesus. What?! My exact reaction. I looked at the dear woman and asked how there could be a new baby Jesus and she just laughed. A few minutes later we were unwrapping the box in which was the new baby Jesus statue needed for Carol Night. Having never been to a Carol Night before, I was still confused. But, later that week I found out. I remember looking at the statue of the infant and falling in love the same way a mother first falls in love with her new child. I remember only wanting to hold that little infant statue for ever and ever. A few days later, I witnessed my first Carol Night and as I saw the Seniors carry in the baby, I knew I wanted to do that one day. So, a few weeks before the end of the semester, I handed in my essay. 

       In my essay, I spoke about Mary's yes. I spoke about the symbolism of carrying Jesus during Carol Night meant for me: embodying Mary's yes. I imagined the overwhelming feeling of love in my heart. And as God would have it, I was one of the four who carried the baby in through the rotunda. The funniest part of it was that I was, by far, the shortest carrying the baby. Hey, even the small can do their part. 

       As we were kneeling there, waiting for Steph to take the Child and put Him in the manger, I thought, how perfect. God works in funny ways, you see, because I had written my essay with the intention of desiring to put Jesus in the manger. However, God knew that I needed to CARRY the baby like Mary did. Mary didn't just simply lay the babe in the manger, but rather she carried him for nine months during her pregnancy. Then, she carried him throughout his childhood. Then, she carried him during his first miracle and all his miracles. She carried him as he walked the way to the cross. And finally, when He died she carried him off the cross and to the tomb. Suddenly, all of that hit me as I was kneeling at the foot of the manger. I had Jesus on my shoulders (with the help of three of my friends) and I was carrying him, not exactly like Mary, but in the spirit of how she carried him. 

       I reflected on that through the night. As I stood there around the Christmas tree with my fellow seniors, I thought of not only the nostalgia of this being my last Carol night as an undergraduate, but also of the encapturing beauty of Christmas. I remembered what God had always asked me to be: a servant to the Lord. That night, I realized that Mary, too, had been asked to serve God as a true servant. She carried the King...I got to carry the king. I was overwhelmed with the notion, with this beauty revelation. So often I reflect on how I serve Christ by serving others, but now I was reflecting on how I got to literally serve Him. It reminded me to continue to serve Christ through others. It reminded me that I was meant to be a servant of the Lord.

      This past weekend, I was on retreat and at the end of the retreat, we were given one of the courts of the Lord. I truly believe that God's timing is so perfect as I was given "the Crib," the place where Jesus rests. This was the second part of my Advent gift from God. First it was the realization that I am called the be servant. This weekend He showed me that I am meant to also carry Jesus forever, making the heart the crib. Of course, I believe this will continue on because we know that from the wood of the crib comes the wood of the cross. There is much joy in watching a child asleep in the crib and there is much suffering in watching a man die upon the cross. If I truly accept this call to be servant of the Lord, there will be great joy, such as the joy of Jesus resting in the crib of my heart, but there will always be suffering. I am called to be a servant of the Lord, just as Mary was. I am called to carry the Lord, serve Him and let Him reside, take rest and refuge in my heart. I must prepare my heart to be a resting place for the Lord. Jesus, I say "Yes," like Mary said, "Yes." I give myself to you, sweetheart. Please, take a rest in my heart. 

Life As A Sheep

"The Lord will guard us as a Shepherd guards His flock."

- Jeremiah 31

I know it's a goat...but you get the point. 

     Did you ever have a "DUH!" moment while sitting in Mass? Have you ever been sitting there, listening intently to the readings or the homily and have a mind-blowing realization? Like suddenly everything makes sense? Well, I get those moments and realizations every so often and this week was full of them. I'll start with Wednesday. 

     While I was sitting in my regular pew in Chapel, I was trying hard to stay wide awake. These nights have been late nights as I still am trying to adjust from that one hour time difference between here and Jamaica. Ok, I'm really just using that as my excuse...I'm a night owl. I'll be honest and say that I completely missed the whole first reading, and I was that awkward girl who slurred all the words of the really long response at the responsorial psalm because I couldn't remember it. As for the Gospel, don't ask me about it; that slipped my focus, too. So what was I focused on during Mass on Wednesday? The Homily. I love when priests give a short, sweet and to the point Homily but it's one that really sticks it to the man. Something with a lot of punch and gusto. The Homily was: "Two questions: Do you know you're a sheep of the shepherd? And are you willing to share that fact?" That's it, the end, no time for an answer. Right away, I started laughing. I was immediately reminded of how I taught the children in Jamaica how to "Bahhhhh" as a sheep or a goat. We spent a good half hour of our walk, "Bahhhh"-ing at every goat we saw. It was pretty precious. I couldn't help but think, I can easily impersonate a sheep and a goat, so I must be practicing in acting as a sheep. And even though all those children don't know it, they are practicing being sheep, too. Yes, I am a proud sheep for sure. And now that I've told you all about my being a sheep, I can answer Father's second question with a yes, too.

      Now for today's "duh" moment. The first reading today said: "God loves a cheerful giver." The response said, "Blessed the man who lends to those in need." And the Gospel said, "Where I am, there my servant shall also be." I suddenly realized why I have this desire to serve God and His people. I am a relatively cheerful person. Most who know me say that I am filled to the brim with positive energy and optimism. Father said in his Homily today that most cannot give financially to those in need and so what God calls us to do is give of ourselves and give our time. Josh Turner sings, "Time is Love" and he is so right. God is everywhere, truly, and so wherever God calls me to go, whether it be my hometown, New Orleans, Jamaica or anywhere else in the world, I've got to go. God gave me this "gypsy soul" and "missionary heart" for a reason: I need to give my time to those in need, be a cheerful giver and be willing to go where He is. The "duh" moment was: "No wonder I have this desire to travel and work with those in need...where God is, there I will go...and God is there." 

      Shepherds were nomadic people, and so as a sheep, a follower of the Shepherd, I must be willing to go wherever He goes and go bearing a smile for all to see. I must be willing to give my time as love. I must be willing to serve wherever God is. And so ladies and gents, or shall I say, rams and ewes, that is the life of a sheep. Bahhhhh!

P.S. Shout out to Sister Angela of Jesus the Good Shepherd on her Vow-aversary!