Growing and Changing NOT Closing

"Change is inevitable; growth is optional."

- St. Charles Seminary's Vocation Director

     While on my way to the turnpike or to the mall or to Target (or chipotle) in the past two weeks I have passed the same Church sign over and over and over. I've always been a sucker for cheesy church signs and sometimes the one out front at Our Lady of Fatima in Bensalem takes the cake. They always have something clever written out front for each and every Holy Day or Church Season. However, it's simply Ordinary Time so what could be so fantastic about it this time? Well you see, the sign read: "We are NOT CLOSING. Just Growing and Changing. Worship here daily." When I read that, I thought, wow, how refreshing to finally see some positivity.

     For many of us in the Lower Bucks County area, we've been experiencing the Archdiocesan Year-Long Study. Basically, there had been a series of interviews, observations and studies at each Parish in Bensalem, Croydon and Bristol for the past year. Things such as structure, facilities, parish activities, Mass attendance and more were taken into consideration. Even though I was at school for most of the year, I was still feeling the strains of the study. It felt as if at any moment everything was going to be ripped away from me. I didn't want my Parish to close. I didn't want to have to go to a different church. I didn't want to change. In the beginning, I was outraged that we were going through this "survival of the fittest" study and I kept saying that I wanted to sing "Give Me Back My Hometown" by Eric Church to anyone in the Archdiocese who would listen. I was upset because I felt like we were on the chopping block. I felt the same as everyone else in all the surrounding parishes. But then I had a change of heart.

     I was sitting in Sister Peggy's Catholic Belief and Practice class (or as we liked to call it, Catechism) when it hit me. We were studying the words of the Creed, "One, Holy, Catholic, Apostolic CHURCH." Let me repeat, ONE. HOLY. CATHOLIC. APOSTOLIC. CHURCH. When we were first discussing this concept, I shared a story about attending Mass in foreign countries. No matter what country I was in, the Mass was the same. The language might have been different, but the Mass was the same and I knew I was in good company. Although I may not have understood the words, I understood that we were one, holy, catholic, apostolic church. Studying the depth behind those words, I became to advocate not against the Archdiocese but rather, with them. 

      For years, since I could drive, really, I've been considered a church hopper. You know, someone who just church hops and doesn't always go to her home Parish for Mass. My reasons stemmed from needing to go to an earlier Mass to having a church date with a close friend. But more often than not, when I was home, I was at my Parish for Mass. Even if I wasn't seen at Sunday Mass there (the best dates take place on Sundays), I was usually at daily Mass. Of course, this busy girl sometimes needed to get to an earlier Mass, so even then I would travel to a closeby church for an earlier Mass. Last Summer, our Pastor presented the idea of an earlier Mass at our Parish to the daily Mass goers. While everyone was deliberating in the pews, I listened. Some wanted, some didn't. Finally, being the youngest in attendance, I raised my hand. The congregation quieted and let me speak. I mentioned that "while an earlier Mass would be ideal for me, I'm not tied to going to the 9:00 AM Mass because I can drive. I don't walk to Mass, I don't carpool, I don't need the later start in the day. When I need an earlier Mass for something, I go to a different Parish. We have a cluster for a reason: to depend on one another." My end resolve was to say that the 9:00 AM Mass works for St. Thomas, it always has. We are all one church and our loyalties aren't to the Parish, but rather to the faith. So, if need be, the other churches provide a means for me to practice to my faith. My biggest emphasis was not the matter of times for Mass, but rather that we are ONE. HOLY. CATHOLIC. APOSTOLIC. CHURCH. 

       This morning, as I was driving to the new 6:30 AM mass at my Parish (I must admit, I'm extremely in favor of this addition!), I was thinking once again of our ONE. HOLY. CATHOLIC. APOSTOLIC. CHURCH. Today, July 1st, 2014, marks the beginning of the mergers. I know full well that people are still upset. St. Thomas Aquinas merged with St. Elizabeth Ann Seton and I know that it might be a hard adjustment for many. For the people of St. E's, I say this, my parish is not your parish and your parish is not my parish. Rather, this is OUR parish now; we are ONE. For the people of St. Thomas, I say this, remember that according to our creed, we are HOLY; be HOLY. To our priests and pastors, remember this, we are CATHOLIC. Our loyalties should be to none other than the faith. And to all of us, including myself, we must be APOSTOLIC to one another's needs during this time of change. We are the CHURCH. 

      This merge will be difficult for everyone if we do not remember that we are one, holy, Catholic, apostolic church regardless of where we go. Change is something even the apostles experienced. Remember how Jesus said, "leave behind everything and follow me." So go where Jesus goes, my friends. Change is inevitable in every aspect of life. We have the choice to grow. I suggest we look at this concept of merging with a positive outlook. It is not one Parish being taken away, and one remaining. It is not that one survived the chopping block and the other did not. It is not and will never be the survival of the fittest. We are ONE. We are (should be) HOLY. We are CATHOLIC. We are APOSTOLIC. We are the CHURCH. No single Parish is closing. But rather, just as the church sign out front of Our Lady of Fatima says, we are growing and changing. My challenge to all of us, including myself, is to embrace that which we profess every Sunday. We must be the ONE, HOLY, CATHOLIC, APOSTOLIC CHURCH. And hey, since mi casa es su casa, there's always room in my pew. Happy Birthday to our new St. Thomas Aquinas Parish. Welcome Home. 

Always Under The Same Moon and Stars

"Home. Let me come home. 

Home is wherever I'm with you."

- Edward Sharpe and The Magnetic Zeros

One of the first pictures of the two of us. AEFL!

     Walking through those front doors is like walking straight into a giant hug. Or being snuggled up with your Teddy Bear under a nice, knitted afghan blanket with a cup of coffee and a good book to read. Or like coming in from playing in the snow and smelling chicken noodle soup on the stove from Mom. Or even like the sun shining warm upon your and tanning your skin on a beautiful summer day. There is warmth and familiarity within those front doors. It's a feeling I can't even describe fully with those metaphors. It makes my soul smile, it makes my heart beat, I feel warm all the way through from my hair to my toes. It's a feeling of being home, but more so, the feeling of knowing you are loved.

     As per the tradition, I headed to supper at the Hospital Convent. Of course, my AE was pretending to be P.F. Chang in the kitchen as she mixed up a wild Lettuce Chicken Wrap (holy wow were they good) as I learned how to make some kind of Polish Egg Soup with Sister Teri. Soon, the sisters were trickling down to the kitchen and dining room as supper was being put out on the serving table. However, before plates were filled, hugs upon hugs were given. Honestly, I never get as many hugs in one night than a night spent at the convent. And since I love hugs so much, giving them and receiving them, it's always a smile for my heart and soul. 

      If there's one thing being in that dining room has taught me, it's that there is no rush when it comes to a meal. I have never eaten a meal with the sisters that has lasted less than an hour. I love it. There is always so much liveliness at those tables with stories upon stories upon stories. Anything from historical moments in our childhoods, like painting our sisters blue, to moments from the day, like the little ones playing guitaras. There is always a story to be told, always. I love it. I have never heard the same story once. They have taught me the true appreciation of one another. The listening, the conversing, the sharing, the appreciation of being with one another. Yes, I have learned that there. 

       Of course, like with any family, once the meal is over, most people head to the living room or in this case, the community room. And so, my AE and I sat next to each other as we talked with one another and the other sisters while at the same time, answering the Jeopardy questions. Women can multitask, you know. As the night wore on, we found ourselves watching old episodes of The Peanuts. I say old, because in reality, they were older than me (from 1985), but to a few of you, that's young. Being there with my sisters felt like home; like a warm cup of coffee being poured into my soul. It gave me a new sense of life and a reminder that there is always a place where I will be loved. 

        Soon, the sisters one by one left the community room and left me, my AE and Sister Eileen to be the last ones there. I tried so hard not to think about it, but as I hugged my AE one last time, my heart was silently breaking a little. This would be the last time I see my AE before she moved to Chicago. No longer will I be able to jump in the car and drive fifteen minutes down the road to see her. I'll have to catch a plane ride next time. And yet, I'll be seeing her on the Web. We'll somehow always be in constant communication. You see there's a reason she's my AE. AE stands for Alter Ego and we are scarily so alike, from Girl Scouts, to arts and crafts, to simply knowing when one needs the other. It still hasn't fully hit me that she won't be nearly as close as she always has been for me...I'm taking it in strides. 

     I know she will be so great as part of the USA CSFN Leadership Team and that God is truly working her to her greatest potential. But here's a secret: I don't like when the familiar surroundings change. Honestly, I can change anything I want about myself or have things about me change and find peace in it, but when things around me start changing, like people moving or buildings changing, my insides freak out. I want to come home from school and have everything be the same. I don't want to the church walls to be a different color and I want to know that I can drive down the road and see my closest sisters within minutes. And yet, things change. Change is inevitable...but growth is optional. And so, both of us must learn to grow from this experience. I'm going to miss being in the kitchen with her almost every other week in the Summer and having CREW at her house and crafting on the fifth floor, but I know somethings will never change. 

      When I walked out the back door, I didn't need a coat; I was still all warm from the hugs and love I received all night long. As I looked to the sky, I almost tripped down the stairs but that would have been ok. As I watched the clouds dance across the moon and stars, I realized something, something that I told Sister Angela Marie before she moved to Roma, Italy. No matter how far away in the world we are from each other, we are always under the same moon and stars. So when I'm looking up at the stars and you are, too, we are connected. You can imagine me doing the same. I'll admit, I didn't cry on the drive home, but as I sit here, being the story-teller that I am, I'm holding back the river. I'm going to miss her. Oh my gosh, am I going to miss her. But the good news is...there may be a trip to the Windy City soon enough for me. Then we'll be back to our old shenanigans. 

      And so, what I'd really want you to remember from this little lesson of mine is: home is wherever you are loved; change is inevitable, growth is optional; and no matter how far away, I am always under the same moon and stars. Best of luck in your new adventure, Sister Michele. Remember, I have Fridays AND Mondays off next semester ;)! AEFL, that is Alter Egos For Life (yeah, I went back to the nineties for a second...I went there).