New Year's Resolutions...So Cliche

    New Year's Eve; a night to party, watch fireworks, be with family and...make resolutions. New Year's, as one of my favorite holidays, has always fascinated me. When I was younger, I was never allowed to stay up. But as I got older and started participating in the festivities, I was intrigued at all the traditions and history. Did you know that Christians used to celebrate New Year's Eve on Christmas Eve? And then later they moved it to March 25, the Annunciation? Did you know that in many countries, people don't exchange gifts until New Year's Eve as a symbol of abundance for the new year? And how about this one: People won't eat meat that used to fly, like Turkey or Chicken, because your luck supposedly flies out the window with it. In the US, a big tradition is the New Year's Kiss. Now, apparently, it's not just for all those romantics but rather for everyone. A simple kiss on the cheek to your loved ones symbolizes purity and love for the new year. And all along, I thought it was just another excuse from Grandmom to hug and kiss all her grandkids. And then finally, there's New Year's Resolutions. They stem from a Christian tradition of evening Mass where the congregation would state their prayers for the New Year. I wonder if all those celebrities know they are promoting the church? Ha ha. No, but seriously, that makes sense to me. As Christians, Catholics, we so often pray to God for good things to happen. And so, in curiosity, I googled what the top ten New Year Resolutions were...to see if maybe I could use them as my New Year's Eve prayer. This is what I found:

                         1. Drink Less Alcohol (too bad I'm only 19...oh darn)

                         2. Eat Healthy Food (ok, ok...good idea.)

                         3. Get A Better Education (too bad I'm already in College)

                         4. Get A Better Job (but I like working for the nuns)

                         5. Get Fit and Lose Weight (I like my body image, thank you)

                         6. Manage Debt and Stress (thanks, Sally Mae, for managing my debt into a million monthly payments; thank you, Sisters, for helping me manage stress with retreats)

                         7. Quit Smoking (too bad I don't smoke)

                         8. Take A Trip (Woohoo Jamaica and New Orleans!)

                         9. Volunteer More (Woohoo Jamaica and New Orleans!)

     Ok, so these didn't really help me. So, during Mass this morning, I conjured up my own list of resolutions:

                         1. Ask God for the chances to use my gifts and to use them for the sole benefit of others.

                         2. Ask God for the stamina to work hard this semester.

                         3. Spend more time with God in Adoration. 

                         4. Ask God for the opportunities to bring others closer to Him.

                         5. Ask God for the strength to never judge a book by its cover so that I may serve the Jesus in every person.

                         6. Ask God for to opportunities to practice gentility, humility, and patience (be less bold and sassy)

                         7. Ask God for the opportunities to serve my family and those I love.

                         8. Ask God for the protection or and opportunities to serve all people, especially the unborn, the less fortunate, the outcast and the hopeless.

                         9. Ask God for the opportunities to spread happiness and joy.

                                                                   And Finally

                        10. Ask God for the patience in waiting for His word to continue my Vocation journey and  the opportunities to serve Him now according to that vocation. 

  

     Now, how's that for a list? Here's to a blessed New Year for you, your family and your loved ones :) 

We Are Family

Current Facebook Status: Can't wait to make pancakes with my AE for Holy Family Day.
Current Tweet: Blogging it up about the Holy Family #yourhomeismyhome

   I have decided that there is no better way to celebrate a feast day than with the community who celebrates it. I've done it on the Feast of the Immaculate Conception and now, on the Feast of the Holy Family. It just so happened that the sister who runs a summer retreat program every year (this year, I got to help!), invited us all back for the Feast; Mass and visiting and Breakfast. And so, at 8:30 I found myself en route to the convent; a drive I don't have to think about; my heart just takes me there.
   As I walked into the Chapel where we spent every morning of our retreat, even as a student helper-outer, so many memories came flooding back. Especially of our last day when tears streamed down my face after knowing in my heart that this is where I belonged; among this family. As the sisters prayed and I knelt listening to their voices, I recalled those moments of pure comfort. I joined those memories with thoughts of the Holy Family. Mary, Joseph and Jesus; all they had were each other. When I'm with the sisters; all I have is them. I don't have any worries, no anxieties, nothing at all. They are my family.
    My reflection on the Holy Family continued with Father's homily during which he said, "Just as Mary, Joseph and Jesus had themselves as family, we must take each one of our sisters as family. We must feel like family here." And yes, as tears built up in my eyes, I knew; these sisters are my family. I am treated like family; like the little sister. And no matter what part of the community I visit, I feel loved like family.
   After Mass, we went upstairs to visit the older sisters who can not necessarily join us for Mass whether from age or sickness. We sang Christmas carols for them which made my heart leap for joy. I hadn't sung in a while and when one of my favorite sisters requested my favorite Christmas song, I almost cried. I sang for her with my friends and the other sisters with us with all my hear. Seeing the sisters smile at our quick little visits was enough for me to know, once again, how perfect I felt there.
    After Mass and visiting, the sisters and the other girls and I went over to make breakfast which consisted of the most deluxe pancake bar I had ever seen. There was fruit, chocolate chips, cinnamon, sugar. You name it, we put it in our pancakes. As we cooked and worked together, it was easy for me to imagine what it would be like five, ten, twenty years down the line cooking together with these sisters and with the girls that I taught in school. It was easy to feel right at home and among family.
    The whole spent celebrating the Feast with the sisters was so perfect. While it was a smaller celebration for us, it was still a celebration of the family we have become and the family I've made with the sisters. And so, as I reflect on the HOLY FAMILY, I am grateful and ever blessed for the holy family I have among me. How many more years, AE?

I Know My Call...

"I know my call despite my faults, and despite my growing fears. But I will hold on hope. I'll find strength in pain. I'll know my name as it's called again."

- Mumford and Sons

     As I walked up the front steps in just my wool sweater, I thought, the first thing I'll hear when I walk through the door is, "Where is your coat, young lady?" And as the front door swung open without my having to ring the bell, what was I greeted with but, "Where is your coat, young lady?" I couldn't help but laugh. No, I wasn't visiting my Mommom; I was visiting my nun. Yep, she's pretty much my grandmother. 

     Walking up the front steps was nothing new for me; It's something I've been doing for about five years and it never ceases to bring such a happy smile to my face. This was a place I called home so many times. And even as we prepared lunch in the kitchen, the sisters said, "You know where things belong better than we do sometimes." It's true, that kitchen is my favorite place in the whole house. I've often said that the best discernment is done in the kitchen, by cooking, eating and cleaning with each other; the sisters seem to satisfy that desire of mine. It might have to do with my Italian heritage, but I simply find the best conversation is done over a meal. Anyway, today, I was home. 

    My nun, my best friend, my dearest sister, my mama penguin, all of the above and more, invited me over (finally) for a long chat and lunch. Oh how I've missed her. It was our chance to finally catch up after so many months. Even though when I visit my high school, I see her, I don't get the chance to catch up and so, there was a lot of catching up to do. I told her all that had happened, all that was happening and all that should be happening. And she did the same for me!! Of course, then we had lunch together at my favorite table. 

    You see, there's the kitchen and then there's the dining room. I love the dining room, but the kitchen is my favorite. There's a little table in there that supposedly seats four, but really, however many you want. No matter what time of day you walk into the kitchen there is always someone at the table and always coffee in the pot. It's the congregating place of the house and without a doubt, there's always a small nun party going on. And that's exactly what we walked into; a nun party. We had lunch with so many sisters who came in and out, and it was just like home. People coming and going and eating and cooking and talking and washing and drying. Sitting around the table, I felt right at home; like I belonged. When I looked down, I half expected myself to be wearing a habit, it felt so perfect. 

    After lunch, me and my nun when to the Chapel, not only to pray, but to clean! I was so excited to be cleaning Chapel, that the sisters must have thought there was something wrong with me. But truthfully, back in High School, I would catch my nun every Friday cleaning, and I would sneak in to pray until she asked me to help her. It became such a ritual and it's part of the reason she and I became so close. You see, she was the first sister I ever told I was thinking about being a sister. And from that moment during my Sophomore year, she quietly prayed for and encouraged me. She never once pressured me into choosing a lifestyle, but rather opened my eyes to her lifestyle.   I spent more time with her talking about my fears and joys and dreams than I had with any other sister. She was the reason I started visiting the convent and she's the reason I keep coming back. While she wasn't the first nun in my life, she is certainly the most influential. Truly, if it wasn't for her, I'd still be trembling in fear of the very idea of entering religious life. I never would have explored the vocation, or be nearly as outspoken about it as I am now. She is the type of sister we all look back to; the sister who opened our eyes and ears to the call. There are so many sisters I know now because of her, and while she is probably reading this now, humbly thinking, not me, it's all true. Many say they don't know where they would be without a certain person, but I know where I'd be; not here and not nearly as close to God. And even though she doesn't know this, sometimes when I want to give up on this vocation and tell God, the deal is over, I think of her smile and her joy and think, "Yeah, that's the life I want." Because "I know my call despite my faults, and despite my growing fears. But I will hold on hope. I'll find strength in pain. I'll know my name as it's called again." And she is my hope. 

A Glimpse Into The Future

    Hanging out with your high school principal while you're a student is weird. Hanging out with her after you've graduated; even weirder. Except for me. Over the summer, during some renovations of my high school, all the sisters moved out and into various different convents in the area. My high school principal just happened to move into my favorite convent and the one I happen to be the most comfortable in. It's the house where I truly feel like family, in a real home. And when she moved in, even though I had already graduated a year, I wasn't sure how we were both going to adjust.
    The thing is, Sister and I were close. She always called me, "Becca, my love," and had no problem giving me random responsibilities around the school. She was even on my Kairos. We were close, but never in the sense that she knew about my vocation. I mean, she knew, but we NEVER talked about it. I had her read my college essay that was all about my vocation, but nothing else was ever mentioned about it. But at the house she lives in now, the sisters are ALWAYS talking about how they can't wait til I live with them for real, or am their sister, fo sho. And so, I wondered and wondered how it would be.
    Even though I had visited so many times since she moved in, we never all really hung out. Most of the time, I would be over for dinner and she wasn't home yet from school, or we would be watching a movie and we'd all pass out on the chairs that just suck you in. Tonight, however, we hung out and it was a glimpse of my future for show.
    The sisters always joke that my family is so used to visiting the convent with me that it will be no transition when I actually join. Tonight, we called up the sisters to see who wanted to go Christmas light looking. One of the sisters automatically said YES! And so we went, picked her up and went on our way. When we got back to the convent, of course, we were invited in for hot cocoa and that's when the party started. My family is so comfortable with the sisters that it's scary sometimes. But my dad right away starts conversation with the sister closest to him, my littlest sister is running around playing tag or hide and seek and me? Well, I'm there in the kitchen pulling out all the ingredients for hot chocolate since I know that kitchen better than the sisters themselves. Finally, we were all seated around the kitchen table, the sisters, my dad, my little sister and me, drinking hot chocolate. We were laughing, sharing stories, singing, tossing napkins and marshmallows and so much more. I sat there, watching the moment before me thinking, that truly that's how I imagine my future except with one difference: I'll be in a habit, too. I imagined my family visiting with the sisters and all of us, just sitting around the table, like one big family. It felt like perfection.
    At the end of the night, I hugged all the sisters good-bye, saving my principal for last. She gave me the best hug you could ever imagine, saying, "Good-night, Becca, my love. I love you, my sister." Yeah, now I know I'm part of the family.

Let's Go Fly A Kite...

    My first thought when I walked (well, really it was ran because I was late for work by five minutes), was, it's a perfect day to fly kites. Now, the everyday college student wouldn't fly a kite on campus on their day off, but for me and my friends, we do it all the time. A few months ago, I bought two kites off Amazon for the sole purpose of creating spectacles and new trends. And so, because I now had kites in my possession, I decided, for the third time this year, we were going to fly them today. 

   Now, the wind here was gustier than the average wind on the noble, holy hill, which was great for instant air. We were testing out the new spool of string that gives 500 feet of distance when I handed the kite over to an amateur kite flyer. Every so often I would hear him freak out about how he didn't know what to do and I simply told him to let it roll out. Finally, he got the hang of it. When I looked up after trying to get the other kite in the air, the kite was flying straight over the building. Our other friend casually mentioned, "If that kite gets stuck in Mary's halo, I'm running away." I agreed. Any tomfoolery with Mary on the dome is like a mortal sin. Instant expulsion or instant graduation, I'm not too sure. But anyway, we laughed it off. 

   Next thing I know, our friend with the 500 feet of string is freaking out. The kite just dipped behind the other side of the building. So, I took it and started rolling it back in. But then, it got stuck. Stuck on what? We couldn't tell. It was on the other side of the building. So, he ran around the building to find it stuck on the tree, NOT Mary's halo (PRAISE GOD!). So after fighting with it and fighting with it, we decided to just cut the string and let the little kite remain perched up in the tree while the string remains draped over the roof of Villa East. Within minutes the news spread and we have officially made history. Now let's hope that our President doesn't find out it was us.....

    It made me think though, how does this apply to my life? It's like Adam and Eve were the kite and the string was the connection to God. However, at the fall (getting stuck in the tree), they cut themselves off from God who held the spool. While we aren't puppets or kites on strings that God maneuvers according to His desire, we so often cut ourselves off the spool. We cut ourselves off the lifeline to God. All because got stuck in a tree. I'm hoping that next time I get stuck in a tree, I'll remember my metaphor and remember not to cut the string but instead allow God to keep pulling at me until I untangle from the branches. 

Christmas Week, Carol Night, and Cotillion, OH MY!

    There is nothing more that I love than tradition. OK, well maybe traditions with nuns. Christmas has always been a time of tradition in my family; however, not the same traditions. When I was little we had the tradition of going to the convent for Christmas Eve Mass (I'm bringing that back this year!) and then going to my Dad's parents' house Christmas Day. Now, it's Mass at my own parish on Christmas Eve and my Mom's brother's house the day after. The few traditions that have stayed are decorating the Christmas tree with each other (they wait for me to come home from school) and going to downtown Philadelphia to see Dicken's village, the Christmas Light Show, and the Christmas Villages. Last year, however, we started a new tradition: Carol Night. 

     Now what is that, you ask? It's a night when the Chorale and all the students at our school gather in the rotunda around the Christmas tree that reaches to the second floor. Family and friends are welcome, too, as well as all the sisters from EVERYWHERE!!!!!!!!! We all sing Christmas Carols, we pray together, and there is a procession of the Baby Jesus from the Chapel to His Manger in front of the tree. It is one of the most beautiful and longest standing traditions we have at school. I love it. This year, my Dad and my littlest sis came to visit and I could hear her voice from the floor above me. She could see me directly and was sending my hand signals and mouthing words to me during the whole performance. The best part is that I understood everything she was trying to say. Our connection is deeper than that of sisters; she is my soulmate. 

     After Carol Night, the next tradition in Christmas Week is Cotillion. It is the semi-formal winter ball and almost everyone comes out for it. Since my class (the class of 2014) was running the show, I got roped into helping set up for one more thing. It was beautiful, I must say. With lights and arts and crafts and snowflakes and mistletoe and streamers, it brought so much excitement to my heart. All the girls got ready in my room in a cloud of perfume, hairspray and Christmas music while the boys simply threw on the shirts and ties and were good to go. We had a ball, dancing our night away until it came time for us to stand back and watch the rest of our schoolmates embarrass themselves slightly. 

    And now, onto finals week. Here's to hoping we all survive! 

Let It Be, Let It Be, Let It Be...Done to Me

     This day in history: John Lennon was shot in 1980; in 1660, the first women to ever appear on stage in England performs in Othello; and Uzbekistan celebrates its Constitution day. However, there is one more extremely important thing that happened this day in history....decades and decades ago: Mary, Most Holy Mama of the Church, was conceived WITHOUT SIN! WOAH! She is the only person ever to be born without the stain of original sin and thus, we celebrate her goodness on December 8, every. single. year.

    When I was little, the feast of the Immaculate Conception was just another Holy Day. But then I went to college and realized how big a deal this day is. She is my school's patron as well as the sisters' patron. Feast Day is celebrated every year with a HUGE mass and then a HUGE feast in the cafeteria. AND there are no classes for the day; everyone has off, including faculty. And so, it ensures that everyone can celebrate!

     Last year, I was one of three members of the choir who sang for Mass. This year, there were nine of us and it was so beautiful. Words cannot explain how much my heart is lifted during this ONE TIME that I get to sing for the "piano nun." She doesn't play at our Sunday Masses and if I never went to daily Mass, I would never hear her play. You have to understand how accomplished this woman is. She plays the piano, the organ, is on numerous Liturgical Music boards and is simply amazing. She is a doctor of music and it is more than an honor to sing for her. It is even MORE of an honor to have her ask you to solo and then tell you how great of a job you did. Ah, that was what happened yesterday. She knows my FAVORITE composition of the Alleluia (only TRUE liturigical musician geeks can say that!) is the Weston Priory AND, we used it yesterday. Not only that, but she asked me to intone it. I was floating on High Heaven's cloud. 

     During Mass, my most favorite part is when the Sisters renew their vows. All of the sisters (and that's a :

lot) stand while we, the congregation, kneel. They say together, "Almighty and eternal God, I, Sister...., renew and confirm with all my heart, the vows of chastity, poverty and obedience, which I made at my profession, and I implore your grace to accomplish them perfectly. May my life be one of faithful love, may it reflect my total dependence on you, may my will be Your will alone. In the imitation of Jesus and Mary, I make my prayer forever. Amen." Imagine how my heart was beating!!!!!! To hear those words and to know that someday I might say them at my final profession and a hundred times after truly brought tears to my eyes! God is so good. 

    After Mass, my friends and I, among the sisters (who were also floating on clouds of happiness), dined at the great feast of delicious foods. My day was then followed by a nap, a date with one of the sisters, work and homework. Oh I can't forget A Year Without A Santa Claus (yes, we watched it.) and ending the night by tweeting the Magnificat back and forth with one of the sisters over Twitter, then skyping her after I facebook chatted her until one am. Needless to say, my day in Honor of Mary was spectacular and SO REAL in the life of a college student. 

Letters to Santa Claus

     My current Facebook status: "I solemnly swear I am up to no good in Biology class...watching cats on Youtube and blogging." I would be lying if I said I was doing our assignment. Truthfully, I should be looking up energy information and animal species for Niger for my final project. But what I'm really doing is ... ok diversion, I actually went back to working on my project because I knew I wouldn't have time to do it at any other time. So now, after class, here I am finishing my blog post for the day.

     My observation group and I, let's just say we're close. We're so close that we go to every extreme to take awkward observation group photos with Santa to give to our favorite nun on campus, who we have deemed the Sister Snowflake 2011. Honestly, I love my observation group so much. We like to joke around and say that one day they'll start a sitcom about us. Something along the lines of "Always Sunny In Philadelphia" but instead call it, "It's Always Rainy on Thursdays," because it rains every single Thursday we are out on observations for education! Yeah, we're a bit crazy, but these people are some of my closest friends.

     When we went to visit Santa, he wasn't as confused as we expected him to be. Actually, after we took the picture, he chatted with us for a good twenty minutes encouraging us to come back every year to get a picture with him to create a memory book of who we are friends with and where we are in our lives. We were talking about our futures with Santa and told him how we will all be teachers. Jokingly my friend said that they would have to fly me in from Haiti so I could be in the picture with my habit. I told him, I'll probably actually be in the city teaching in my school that I established OR in Ghana. But I don't want to jinx anything like Sr. Luke did in A Nun's Story. Santa told us that these are the memories we will remember the most; not stressing out over tests and exams but going out just to get a picture and grab some lunch. And he's right. These are the people who promise that they will come pick me up from whichever convent I wind up in to take me out for lunch and a Santa picture. There was talk the other day about seeing the Easter Bunny, too. But I think that might be pushing it! Oh, such is the life of a college student discerning to be a religious sister!

Are you SURE you want to be a High School Teacher?

    Let's set the scene: all girls' elementary academy, main office. Characters: Four Secondary Education Majors and a an overenthusiastic secretary. Question posed: Who wants to be in the Kindergarten classroom?
   That is exactly what we all walked into yesterday morning for our last Thursday of observations this semester. After observing in numerous grade schools and high schools, each one of my observation friends confirmed that elementary ed is not for them. Except, I had some seconds thoughts. I absolutely LOVE little kids, especially when I can teach them about God (I'm a Theology minor, you know). So, guess who volunteered for the sake of the children to observe the Kindergarten class? ME!
    I walked into the classroom, dressed in my business attire and heels. Had I known I would be in the Kindergarten room, I would have worn pants and flats. But alas, God gives us all blessings when we least expect them. And so, we headed to pick up our lovely children from the gym and join them in prayer. It was so great. Finally, we were in the classroom. The first lesson was a Spanish lesson and I simply observed the girls as they learned, studying each girl's personality and knowing which ones would automatically claim me as their best friend. Right away, I spotted a little girl who could easily be described as a "problem" child. However, there was more to her than originally meets the eye. She had a LOT of depth. She was observant but bored. Spanish wasn't her favorite thing. As I sat with her during the next activity, I realized that she is the type of girl I was when I was younger. I wasn't labeled as a problem child but I barely spoke (HUGE shocker, I know) when I was in the classroom. Although I was very smart, I was more interested in helping the teacher or writing or watching. My biggest thing was that I cared A LOT and I wanted to uplift people and make them happy. This little one did that for me. As soon as I walked in, she complimented me and hugged me and sat next to me and held my hand and helped me out. She was so precious.
    As the lesson went on, the girls "showed off" for me their skills of reading the "at" family (eg. words like fat, cat, rat, that..) and then we did some group work. The teacher was great in asking me to help lead a small group flash card study. YES! OF COURSE! I had a group of four girls and we talked about the words on the card, what sound their first letter made and anything relative to that picture. We laughed a good deal, and the girls we ultimately beyond that level of smart. Two girls tried to fool me about their names, but I fooled them in return.
    After the lesson, we headed to snack. I really didn't want to leave the girls who immediately took a liking to me. On our way down to the cafeteria, one of the girls took my hand and told one of the sisters that I was her new best friend and she loved me a lot. I almost cried. They all fought over who got to sit next to me and I promised to sit at every table. Then as I was leaving, their teacher asked the girls to say good bye and with a goodbye, God bless you, they did. The teacher asked me if I was sure about teaching high school girls, and while I said, I am sure, I decided that I'm going back to school for a double cert in secondary and elementary.
   I used to visit my little sisters Kindergarten class every day I had off in high school and being at the girls' academy, I was reminded of how much I love the little ones so much. I love the way they learn and teach me and play. Thank goodness the teacher asked me to come back anytime. I told the girls, as I left, that I was so proud of them for helping me learn so well to be a good teacher and that I couldn't wait to come back and visit with them! God is so good!

The Life of an English Major and the Art of Procrastination

    If one was ever an English major or knows an English major (they aren't that rare, I promise), she would know that for every page, it only takes ten minutes. Unless it's a research paper; then, add five minutes per page. And so even though I have a 3 page paper and 5 page paper (which are really NOTHING compared to what I had to write in high school), both of which are due tomorrow, I am not worried because it will barely take me two hours to write both. So what did I do instead of writing my paper?

    It all started when I put on a playlist called "Happiest Love Songs", most of which were acoustic songs. It's always been my dream to be that crazy sister who plays guitar for her students every Friday. Legitimately, I have had this dream of me dressed in a habit of sorts, singing for my students. I could sing anything from secular songs that I can relate to Jesus, or improvisation to teach them lessons. And especially there will be days when we use music as prayer instead of vocal prayer (future students of mine, also be on the look for journaling and meditating). So after listening to all the acoustic music, I made my FB status, "I really need to learn how to play guitar if I'm going to be that awesome, guitar-playing nun that sings to her students every Friday in class..." Then all of a sudden people left and right were liking it and commenting on it, wishing me luck and what not. Then one of my closest friends posts a scene from the 1980's movie, Airplane, where the lady borrows a guitar from the nun on board. So then, seeing what YouTube could offer me, I searched "Nuns playing guitars." NOTHING. Can you believe it? Not a single nun playing guitar. There WAS a nun playing air guitar at a Steubie conference, but no legit guitars, people. So now I REALLY need to learn guitar so I can post videos of myself on YouTube for curious discerners wondering if nuns play guitars. I promise you, they do. I know so many sisters who play guitars and I sing for them. It's great. But anyway, back to the story. So, disappointed in no guitars, I searching "Singing Sisters" and THE DAUGHTERS OF ST. PAUL CAME UP. 

    When I was in high school, I used to sit in the computer lab after school while waiting for my Daddy to pick me up and I would just listen to the Daughters on YouTube for hours while doing homework. I love them. I saw them in concert two years ago and I was in love. Their voices are angelic and it was literally like being in Heaven. I really, really, really thought about discerning with them because I love to sing. Literally LOVE. When I sing, it's one of the few moments I feel so utterly free. And when I listened to them, again I felt so free. But I know my vocation is to teach. 

   So anyway, that's my story. This is just the simple life of an English major who also wants to be a sister. 

I Love My School A Million...

   When most people get to college, they never even think twice (or even once) about going back to their high school for a visit. It's time to party, live life and forget the past. And then there's me and the rest of the Naz Acad alum. Going back to our high school is a MUST. With all the tradition wrapped around the place, and the faculty who you just can't get enough of, you don't think twice about it; you just go. 

    Thanksgiving last year was the biggest influx of alum I had ever seen at Mass. This year, it was just me and one of my best friends since most of our classmates were stuck still at school. But if I was home, there was no question about it; I was getting myself up early to go and visit. You see, there's something about our Chapel and Mass that one can never escape. It brings you such a feeling of warmth, love and faith. It's a feeling that truly can not be expressed; it must be experienced.

    And so, at the last possible minute, we slipped into the last pew. We opened our programs and smiled at every song selection. Back when we went to school there, we would so easily harmonize with each other during Mass. We couldn't wipe the smiles off our faces as Mass began. Now, it's never a complete Naz Mass without a Music Department fail and of course, within the first few minutes, they failed by not coming in on time and switching tempos. Oi. But never the less, Mass was always enjoyable.

   Most of you have never witnessed a Nazareth Mass, and if you ever get the chance, be forewarned: newcomers always, ALWAYS get freaked out during the Our Father. Every single person in the chapel moves toward the center and it gives a loud, thunderous sound. We all join hands and pray together. We lift our hands in praise to God and then stand still until the sign of peace. It becomes the loudest sign of peace you could ever hear. Every time I am moved to tears, because those few minutes are what we are all about. Every. Single. Time. Tears. 

   While it's so nice to walk around and get to see each those teachers we will always love, there is something so special about sharing the Mass with all 450 students and the faculty. There is something so spiritually moving about the thunderous roar of Eastland shoes moving across the Chapel. There is something more than comforting in holding hands with students past and present and teachers, all at once; everyone connected. And there is something so unique, which makes one truly love their school a million, about having the Communion Ministers still say, "Body of Christ, Becky," even when you graduated two years ago. Yeah, this school is almost something magical but it's so real. And I really do love my school a million. 

Finally Got Grandma Beat...

   Here's to: My grandma, Mommom, as I call her, the hipster. Ok, so she's not your typical hipster, but she's pretty hip, as you can see in the picture below. I'm her spitting image and her favorite. Sorry, cousins and siblings, but you all know the love a grandparent has for the first born is HUGE. Anyway, so let's talk about her hipster attitude. While she may have false teeth and spends her retired days crocheting me AWESOME blankets for my dorm, she is the most in the know grandmoo I know. Seriously.

   People think I'm technologically advanced, but my mommom beats me on that one, believe it or not. She had a computer long before I ever did and she taught me how to use it. She has digital cable while I still am stuck watching channels 3, 6, and 10. She had a digital camera before I even knew that film was going out of style. In fact, I inherited her first digi cam. Once giant computer screens were out of style, she bought a laptop with a webcam and was on skype before I even leveled up past dial-up internet. Fast forward to present day. I now have my own laptop, for school purposes only, of course and I'm on Skype. I finally have my own digital camera that aids me in my LOVE for photography and editing. And, I finally know how to work YouTube now that she's taught me. However, Grandmoo didn't know what a Facebook was until I showed her. But, of course, she made one and "likes" all my statuses, pictures and posts. I made a blog, to one up her again, and guess who follows me: Mommom. So, HI MOMMOM I LOVE YOU! But finally, FINALLY, I think I may have done the final one up. Today, after detesting the hype for years, I made a Twitter and already, I love it. And so, finally, I got Grandma beat. Until of course she follows me on Twitter and gets my tweets sent to her mobile phone...

   Follow me on Twitter : nunbetter_BG92

Leave Me In The Turn

    As Fr. Bill said during our tour of the Shrine of the Miraculous Medal, it takes a special desire to get up early as a college student and spend the day Shrine hopping. Yeah. Actually, I would have been up anyway and at Mass. But I mean, you can tell me I have a special desire and you'll be right. So here's the truth: I switched my work day so that I could go to the shrine with a few of the campus ministry "groupies." As religious of a fanatic I can be at times, my main motive was just getting off campus and going into the city. The shrine was beautiful, don't get me wrong. But I already knew Catherine Laboure's story and I wear my Miraculous Medal proudly with devotion in French, mind you, my original foreign language. It was lovely to be among so many devoted people praying the Novena I've had memorized since I started going to daily Mass. And to have beautiful music in addition to a great homily on the Magnicat (my favorite Mary prayer). But something just wasn't hitting my heart yet. Then we all got in the van to go home when Father said we were making a surprise trip the Carmelites. HOLY WOW! Nothing like high heaven!!!

     Teresa of Avila has always been my favorite saint (in addition to the other carmelites, Therese and Edith). Her go-get-her attitude, independence, sass master ways and realness just defines me to a tee. She's a mystic, a reformer and had such a real relationship with God. Oh and she suffered from severe migraines. Her life story=my life story. I love her and I always, honestly, wanted to live the life of Carmel. I've always desired the silence and strict lifestyle of Carmel. I know, BIG SHOCKER, right? I'm loud, boisterous, out-going. Why on EARTH would I cloister myself? Honestly? I don't know why. I just live their lifestyle. Now the tradition is, that every time you visit the monastery, you bring an offering to the nuns. Since it was spur of the moment, we didn't have an offering. So, I volunteered. Just put me in the TURN! Father and I laughed, since we were the only ones who understood until everyone finally saw the TURN. "See, you could really fit in there. Get in. We're leaving you here." I had no objections. But then I thought about my siblings and all the others I would leave behind. My blog right now is clear indication that I didn't stay but oh how I wish I had to courage to enter Carmel. 

Holy Spirit Chapel, Carmelite Monastery, Philadelphia

    So let's talk about normal. Every college student skips class for various reasons. Most of the time, college kids are sick, "sick", need a mental health day or simply are skipping because the very next day starts some type of break and they have a plane to catch. I fall into this catagory, only IF I am completely incapacitated by the flu (like I was LAST week). However, today, I did the normal with the extraordinary. Yes, I skipped classes (with permission) BUT it wasn't for any of the above reasons. Today, I proudly skipped class to be a student leader for a local high school's senior girl retreat. WOOHOO!
    Needless to say, I was riding my high horse of happiness (AKA the school van) on the way there and I really couldn't wait. When we finally got there (everyone loses their way sometimes...), we were met with a sister who HAD AN ENGLISH ACCENT. I don't know about you, but I love ACCENTS! So immediately I was in love with the place. Then we walked around to find our "sacred space"  and found the CHAPEL! AHHHHHH. So it's completely in the round and all you see through the windows is NATURE; trees, leaves, squirrels, loveliness. Not to mention JESUS in EXPOSITION! Oh my goodness, it was a slice of HEAVEN!
   Ok so anyway, our lovely ladies of God get there and talk about ROWDY RAMBUNCTIOUS TEENAGERS. Oh wait...that's me. Yeah, I was ready to BOUNCE. OFF. THE. WALLS. from happiness. Everyone seemed so open to the retreat and I just know it's going to be a good one; I know there's going to be happiness and tears and GOD, totally! We break up into our groups, make our goals and share, discuss, and get to know each other. And then we get to the real deep stuff; cross the line and path of angels.
    If you've ever done a cross the line, you know it consists of real deep personal questions. It talks about discrimination, beliefs, race, the whole nine yards. And then there's th question: Cross the line if you've ever felt alone in a crowded room. Every single girl moved forward. Including myself. It happens, we all feel alone at times. But that's why we do our path of angels. Everyone lines up on either side of the hallway and then one by one every person walks down the middle so that they have to listen to the BEAUTIFUL comments everyone has for them. Talk about moving. Wow, tears. After every girl went through, we thought we were done. But no. The Spirit was so present that each of the girls encouraged the leaders to go down as well. Now if you read my most recent blog about adventuring and getting injured, you know that I have a brace on my knee and have to hobble instead of walk. In the words of one of my best friends, "my swag is off". Yeah, my swag! So I hobbled down the LONG hallway to the cheers of beautiful, young women I have never met before.
   Finally, after that oh so moving exercise, we all moved to the Chapel. Yeah, the little piece of Heaven I mentioned earlier. The final part of the retreat was the letter reflection. I won't tell you too much except that truly this was a time when the girls were made aware of how much they are loved by family. Having done this reflection before, I can truly tell you that it creates a lot of tears and emotions. I even found myself crying with all the girls. Being in that sacred space, with all those girls, with the calming music, I could feel nothing but love. Especially as I sat on the floor a bit incapacitated with my slacking knee and shared moments with dear hearted Sister.
    I can honestly say, that for the first time being a student leader for a retreat, nothing allows me to be more peaceful that spreading LOVE in anyway. Yeah, I guess that's my calling: to love in every way possible. "Our vocation is to love." (Mother Teresa)

Charters, Kites and Creeks OH MY!

   If there was one thing that I miss most from being away from home besides the sisters and my family, it's the water. Yes, the dirty Delaware River. I miss it. Truth is, I would go there all the time when I needed space; it's my outdoor Chapel. Something about the steady waves and the wind blowing across my face simply makes me feel so loved by God. While at school, whenever I need that "me" time, I simply go for a walk around campus and take in the beauty of it. But no matter how much "me" time I take, there's always something missing; the water. 

    This past weekend, despite being swamped by homework and the need to clean my room, one of my best friends steered me away from it. And let me tell you how worth it it was. WE FINALLY FOUND WATER!!!!!!!!!!! And mud and swamp and foxes and WATER! Yes, our shoes were covered in mud and swamp life, and yes, I did fall and busted up my chin and knee and YES, we did see a fox. But all of it was so worth it, because literally right down the road there's a creek, that used to be Mary's Lake where residents of our school used to sun bathe on the afternoons off, and I can finally find my solace. 

    The day of adventuring wasn't complete, however. Being on a "mountain" of sorts provides much wind and a few weeks ago, after for the first time flying a kite with one of my best sister friends, bought two of my own kites. Together, my friend and I, after cleaning up all the mud, flew our kites for a good two hours. Having just found the WATER and now having the wind blow across my face, I felt nothing more than pure love for my JC, the one who probably made the day just to spoil me. I can't tell you how much the day of pure, kiddie, freedom set my heart and soul on fire. 

    We all need "me" time with JC, and for me that "me and JC" time is spent in quiet, silent moments being in nature. Yes, it's NORMAL for college students to be walking around the campus, enjoying the Fall weather. But for me, I make it a prayer. Flying kites, was a prayer. Finding the water, definitely a prayer. Everything NORMAL about being a college student is changed when I add the word discernment to my repertoire. And it's only changed very slightly by the mere fact that I find GOD in everything. Especially these beautiful, Fall moments during which, I am simply a CHILD of GOD. Enjoy the adventure photos!

To Be Found (Founder's Day 2011)

    One of my lucky jobs with my sisters is being able to decorate random things for random occasions. I think my job title is technically, "Project Assistant" which makes sense that I do a lot of Presentation things. And so, this week at work, Sister and I were working on "Presenting" the founder's of her community for "Founder's Day," November, 10. And so, together, we carried down the four/five most important people in her community. Here's their story:

    From left to right in Chronological Order (for the exception of Mother Camilla in the middle)  is Teresa of Avila, St. Alphonsus, Mother Camilla Maloney, Fr. Louis (Louie) Gillet and Mother Theresa Maxis. Mother Camilla didn't necessarily help found the community, but rather the school. Her lovely face is present because of Charter Day which is November 12; it's the day our school was chartered/founded. A long, long time ago, St. Alphonsus began an order of priests named the Redemptorists. Quite a few years down the road, Fr. Louis Gillet became a Redemptorist priest and moved to the United States for mission. When he got to his mission, he realized a need for sisters in schools but there were no sisters. He said, "If I can't find any community, I will make one." And so, he enlisted the help of three women, one of whom was Mother Theresa Maxis and together they began the IHM community. St. Teresa is important because she greatly influenced the charisms of the community. Their story is one of courage and grace and Divine Providence.  

    In setting up for the great festivities, Sister and I shared many great laughs. The year before when we set up the same portraits, the rotunda (see below) was under construction and some of the stained glass was falling. We weren't allowed to work through the center of the rotunda for safety reasons, but Sister, so passionate about her community's history, insisted we "risk our lives" for them. And so, "illegally" we ducked under the shattering rotunda to put up the faces of faith! This year, while not as extreme, we ran into some hurdles. This time, the easel for St. Teresa of Avila was broken. In Sister's words, "It is not vital for her to be present with the other founder's, but since she is your favorite saint, let's find a way to get her up there." And so, together we searched and searched the school for an easel. As you can see, she made it up. 

    Spending time with one of my many sisters, and these faces of faith, is something I can't take for granted. It's a beautiful thing to learn about the history of a community and watch the sisters' passionately tell their stories. And to think, that my girl, Teresa, was a part of all it. Gotta love the saints!!!

My Soul is Thirsting...

   I'm supposed to be working on homework right now, instead I'm multi-tasking and blogging and picking music for our monthly F.O.P. (Festival of Praise...AKA Adoration with BEAUTIFUL music...no conceitedness imtended). Oh yeah, and snacking on chocolate...even though I really shouldn't since I'm lactose intolerant. But hey, you only live once, right?! Anyway, I realized I haven't shared any stories lately, so here goes...
   I am so blessed to be surrounded by familiar faces in blue and white...aka...sisters. I see them walking to class, I see them in class, I see them at Mass every morning, I see them in the Cafeteria, I see them when I'm out on my walks, I see them when I go shopping, I see them EVERYWHERE! But really, I'm not complaining. I also work for/with them. Aside from being Portress (stemmed from the Latin, porta, meaning door or entrance...) at the Motherhouse (place of formation and council) across the street from school, I also work one on one with the Sister who is the head of Campus Ministry. How did I score that job? Well, this same sister was my FYE Teacher (woot, FIRST YEAR EXPERIENCE) and she saw right through me. I guess a lot of sisters caught on to my discernment when I continued to get up at the crack of dawn for prayers and Mass way into the second semester, but she saw right through me from the very beginning. As part of my FYE course, we had to fill out on of those intense personality assessments and apparently, I scored low on my desire to be at college or finish my studies. Hm..I wonder why?! And so, when we sat down to discuss my "low desire" I could only laugh. She hesitated when she asked if there was somewhere else I'd rather be. I answered very assertively, "Yes, the convent, sister." With that, she smiled, and said, "All in God's time." I shook my head in agreement and from there she became a close confidante. Soon after that encounter, she asked me if I needed a work study job. OF COURSE I DID! And there I found myself, working one on one with someone I felt saw right through me. And in truth, she really did.
    Last week, while I was icky sicky with the flu, she emailed me from down the hall (we live on the same floor in my dorm building) and advised me to rest and skip classes and work. As heartbroken as I was to be missing work with her, I was so relieved to be able to sleep. And like me, she really wanted to be rest and rest and rest so that I would be fully restored for the Final Vow Ceremony. All throughout my weekend she was emailing me checking up on me and asking how things were going. I simply emailed back, there is too much to tell; I must tell you in person. And so, for the majority of my "work" hours both yesterday and today, we sat down and talked about my weekend and my life in general. It's the reason I truly love working with her; it's personal and she is such a mentor to me still. It's how every day at work starts and ends; talking about our lives.
    Today I had to laugh when she asked if I was doing a bit of spiritual reading after Mass in the big Chapel. You see, we are pew buddies (since I needed "help" with my Liturgy of the Hours book way back when) and after Mass in that particular Chapel, I always do a bit of reading while I wait for my friends to go to breakfast. And usually, it is a bit of Spiritual reading, since it is the only time I really have to read. However, this time it wasn't. In fact, it was my newest romantic fiction novel. I confessed and told her it wasn't this time. But to make up for it, I handed over my FAVORITE spiritual reading book, Lying Awake, so she could do the same next week. Of course, with her, everything HAS to be discussed, and she asked WHY it's my favorite. Well, aside from what I told her, I think she'll really see why when she opens the book and finds all my pencil markings.
    For me, work isn't a burden because I get to talk with some of my favorite people and closest mentors. Whether the realize it or not, I honestly hold them in such esteem, especially my Campus Ministry Sister. Because without her knowing it, she gives me such wisdom and I don't know where I would be without her!

P.S. The song is one that's been stuck in my head for a few days...guess what's getting put on the FOP playlist!!!!!

A Reason to be here...

          For the first time in over three months, I went back to my home Parish for Mass. Out of the three times I’ve been home from school, I haven’t gone to Mass at my Parish; I’ve gone with the sisters. Even when I’m home during breaks, I don’t go to my own Parish for a plethora of reasons. The main reason is that I find I can’t focus when I’m home. Between sitting with my little sisters and giggling through the whole Mass to seeing the large amount of parishioners that literally line up to talk to me about a various list of topics stemming from school, to discernment, to Scripture. Gee whiz, I’m flattered really, but I need to focus on my Jesus. Another reason is that sometimes going to my home Parish is too painful for various reasons, and instead of being reminded of those memories, I prefer to church hop. But alas, today there was not nearly enough energy in my system to church hop and I had already spent two full days with the sisters (not that either party would have minded…just my family), and I found myself sitting in a side pew, trying my hardest to be incognito about being home.

            As I knelt there, I attempted to focus but I was once again too distracted by the sea of familiar faces and the sometimes painful memories. In desperation, I merely said, “Jesus, why am I here. Give me a reason to be here.” Now I must tell you, it’s not a secret that my Boyfriend loves me, but sometimes He likes to teach me patience. Today, however, He delivered ASAP.

            If you’ve ever spoken with a Vocation Director, he or she may have told you to pay close attention to the Scriptures because that is Jesus’ love letter to us. Some days I find it easy to listen intently to Scripture but I often have those mornings where I’m still half asleep when I’m at Mass. Today, thank goodness, I was wide awake, or I would have missed JC’s message to me.

            First, the first reading was from the book of Wisdom. One line in particular spoke to me saying, “Those who wait for her at dawn will not be disappointed.” I felt as if Scripture was talking about me. You see, as a college student, it’s not normal to get up at the crack of dawn when classes don’t start for another two, sometimes three hours. Yet, the dawn is my time with JC. I’ve always loved sunrises and JC sure does paint a beautiful picture for me every morning. For He who waits for me every morning at dawn, I will not disappoint.

            Second, for the first time, I heard the new assistant priest give a homily. At first I was confused because I had never seen him before. Ever. But my little sis insisted he had been there a while. And so, after the initial confusion, I sat intently and tried to listen as closely as possible. However, my little sis, like me, sometimes doesn’t know when to stop talking and so, we had our own conversation. Suddenly, she stopped dead in the middle of a sentence to say, “Becky, did you hear that?” and before I could ask what she was talking about, I heard it: “…Holy Family of Nazareth.” I was literally blown away. You see, not only was the Homily (I soon learned) about the love of the Holy Family of Nazareth, the Sisters of the Holy Family of Nazareth is one of the few communities I’ve explored in my discernment, but they are also the community I was “raised” by and within which I find so many of my best friends.

            And so, in response to my, “Jesus, give me a reason o be here,” He answered, “…Holy Family of Nazareth.” Perhaps it was nothing short of a sign from JC to set me in the right direction. Or maybe it was the sign that I needed to LOVE even more and in that LOVE be open to GOD’s plan for me, not my own plan. Regardless, I’m still head over heels in love with my Jesus. He has truly captured my heart and I am His. 

The Nun Wedding...Finally

    In the words of my little sister, "Sister got married to Jesus today. Forever and Ever." Yeah, she got it right. Seriously, this day could not have been any more beautiful for my dearest sister. The Chapel was perfect, the people were perfect, the music was perfect, her smile was PERFECT! Seeing the face of a beautiful bride to be was nothing short of amazing. Having been there to witness her make her final vows of poverty, chastity and obedience and receive her ring that says "My Beloved is mine and I am my Beloved's" was beyond exciting. It pulled at my heart strings so greatly and as I knelt in the oh so familiar Chapel, listening to the Litany of Saints, tears of joy and hope streamed down my face. 

     There was something about being in the Chapel that first threw my heart into a tizzy, fainted by God's love. After all my years of sneaking in there during my lunch period EVERY DAY during my four years of high school, that place still brings back so many memories of my discernment. Let's just say it's a place where I shed many tears in frustration and many laughs in happiness. It's where I so often received Jesus in the Eucharist and once again I did all of these today. And yet, while all of those days were special, today was the most special of all. Not only was I there for my first "Nun Wedding" with so many whom I love, but also because it was today that spoke most to my heart concerning my vocation.

      First, I must tell you that the Homily resolved around three things: Jesus saying, "I love you" at our Baptism, Jesus saying, "Live in my Love, forever" during our lives and finally, thanking those people who have blessed us by helping us live in Jesus' love. Today was so full of me thanking the people who have helped me live in His love, mostly the sisters. 

      After the final profession, so much festivity surrounded me. I saw sisters I haven't seen in years, sisters I've never met and my closest sisters with whom I correspond daily. With all those sisters, however, there was one common phrase: "I can't wait until YOU are a beautiful bride of Christ, too, Becky." Yeah, imagine my face flushing red with pure love of the Lord. If I've even been more in love with JC than today, I cannot remember. Truly He sent me each one of those sisters, from my closest to my newest, to give me hope for my future as a Sister. A legitimate, religious sister. 

     Just like every wedding, the reception wouldn't be complete without at least two crazy people, taking crazy pictures and doing crazy things. I am proud to say, that I and my long-time partner in crime sister, fulfilled that obligation by taking very serious pictures with the mixer made for intense amounts of baking. Oh and of course, the awesome, new dish washing phenomenon that we are even more excited to use!

     And finally, just like most little girls, while at a real wedding, plan their special day with their husband-to-be, I was dreaming about my final profession date. Since I have a HUGE, supportive family and so many friends, I imagine a Chapel stock full of people, and my high school gym decorated picnic style with much dancing, laughing, singing and sharing. In this dreaming, I wondered, too, who would be the sister/sisters who stay up with me the night before my final vows because the Lord knows I will be too excited to sleep? Hmm...who will that lucky person/people be? I can truly only imagine a community room full of my very closest sisters, all in one place (because the all BETTER fly/drive in), sharing story upon story upon story...of their wedding days. 

It's the Beauty of Teamwork...

     The past three days, I thought I would never make it to this weekend feeling better. I prayed and prayed and had a million others praying for me, too. Yet still, even this morning I was feeling the remnant of what may have been the flu. On the car ride home, I felt like I was being baked in a sauna. After sluggishly taking an hour to drag my belongings up the stairs to my room (which my middle sister has decided to take over, even though she has her own room), I got into the car and headed to the bank to begin the weekend home routine: Bank, Pick-up Lizzie, Shopping, Home, Make things. Except this time, we weren't going shopping until AFTER we helped set up for the reception. 

     Who's getting married? you ask. A nun. Yep, finally. After so many years of postulancy, noviate, and temporary vows, she'll finally be saying the big YES to JC in front of SO. MANY. PEOPLE. I can't even begin to express my excitement except by taking it step by step. So let's start with the reception set-up.

     The moment I walk into my alma mater, I no sooner bump into the Provincial Superior (AKA head sister of the sisters in the USA). I once again introduce myself and then get put to work. Now you must keep in mind that my seven (and a half) year old sister is with me. I was worried that she might be more in the way than of any help, but alas, her old best friend, my high school principal, took her under wing. While I was dry-mopping the Chapel (ahhh...my little piece of Heaven) floor, my little sis (and big sis) were hanging hangars up in the hallway. Once our task there was finished, we headed down to the "Student" Dining Room to set up tables, chairs and place settings. Right away, another one of my closest big sisters took my littlest sis under wing and put her to work. Perfect. She wasn't a bother to anyone and I was truly shown the closeness of our sisterhood. While my little sis was off counting chairs and forks and knives and spoons and anything else the sisters could find for her to count, I was standing shoeless on a table hanging leaves. Yep, leaves. I was counting ceiling tiles and hanging leaves with one of my closest sisters, my retreat group leader from Senior year. When we finally got the job done, I hopped down and she wrapped her arm around me.

    "Isn't this exciting? Gosh, I'm so glad you still fit perfectly in the crook of my arms. I love you and can't wait for your day."

    Talk about me being ready to burst. If that didn't do it, the next few lines from the sisters who I never met before sure did. Aside from being told how much I was loved by my closest sisters, and being hugged and thanked a million more times (seriously, it never gets old and I love it), my little sister's new best friend, linked my arm as we walked out of the building together.

     "Becky (there it is again), did you ever think of being a religious. I mean, I think you'd make a beautiful sister."

     Tears filled up in my eyes, most likely more so from the fact that I was still an isty bitsy sick, but none the less. I placed my hand in hers and told her, "Yes, I have actually. I've been openly discerning for five years now."

     "Oh honey, I knew it."

     I either wear my heart on my sleeve or these sisters have some type of vocation radar. I couldn't contain my joy as it grew as the night went on. I set to working on my sister's "wedding" gift while carrying on a conversation with a few of the other sisters on Facebook. Yep, back on Facebook again. While the conversations started out as exclaiming our excitement for tomorrow's festivities, they ended up hoping and planning for the day when I can finally say my own YES to the big JC!! Oh how much I love Him! 

My Mom Away From Home

"When someone takes care of you when you're sick, it's a true indication that they really love you." - Unknown

   If you've ever been sick at college, there's a deep desire to be taken care of. Scratch that, if you've ever been sick, all you really want is for someone to take care of you, mostly your mommy. So, there I was, laying in my bed with the itchy, scratchy throat and runny, stuffy nose. All I wanted was someone to take care of me, but my mommy was an hour away. So, I resolved that I would get better on my own, and took some medicine then went to bed an hour earlier than normal. 

   The next day I woke up with the desire to dislocate my throat from my neck it burned so much and I felt extremely dizzy when I jumped off my bed. But, I had to learn how to be bilingual and teach a lesson on Healthy Relationships in my FYE class. There was no bailing yet. In my third class of the day, despite the heat being turned all the way up, I was freezing, sneezing, and my eyes were constantly tearing. I figured, I would push through my lab and sleep til my 7:20-10 class. But alas, God had other plans.

    I'm a big believer that sometimes we have to fall in order to be lifted up and so, whenever I get sick, I believe that maybe it's God's way of testing my dependency on Him. However, this time God's message wasn't about my dependency on Him but rather other people, especially those I love.

    Whenever I get sick, I usually don't tell anyone, and pull myself through it, except my mommy. But this time, I knew I could not be sick for this weekend and asked a few people to pray for me. The one of my closest sisters, despite being far away from me, took the praying for me to a whole new level. She took care of me via texting. I got a morning text that said, "I hope you're feeling better for your observations." And then when I wasn't feeling any better, but even worse, "You better be drinking lots of fluids and taking medicines. Have you eaten anything today?" She also encouraged me to get lots and lots of rest. 

    It's not easy being sick at school, especially when your mommy is an hour away. But knowing that people, especially my closest sisters, love me so much enough to take care of me, even if they have to do it via texting, somehow makes the NyQuil work ten times faster. So thanks Sister "Mom" for your taking such good care of me. You're the best and I'm way beyond blessed. 

They Call Me Becky...

"What's in a name, if by any other name, a rose still smells as sweet." - Shakespeare

      Even though I always introduce myself to new people with my full name, Rebecca, I am always never referred to as a Rebecca. When I was younger the only people who would use my full name were my parents...when I was in trouble. I would hear, "REBECCA LYNN!!!!!!!!!!!!" roar from wherever my parents were. I assume for a little while my grandparents all referred to me as Rebecca, but mostly everyone called me Becca. That was, until, I met the nuns. 

      Growing up, every Christmas Eve we went to Mass at the convent. After Mass was always a treat of cookies and milk or hot cocoa. Aside from my Dad promising the sisters he was going to send me to them when I turned 16 (which he didn't), the only other thing I vividly remember is being called "Becky" by the sisters. No one ever, ever, EVER referred to me as Becky except for them. I guess to others I just didn't appear to be a Becky.

      Fast forward quite a few years to when I was 12 and my littlest sister was born. While our middle sister referred to me as CaCa, short for BecCA, little Lizzie has never called me anything but Becky. We had stopped visiting the convent for Christmas eve Mass by this point and so now, the only person to call me Becky was my little sis. 

      Fast forward once more to my Sophomore year of high school. Since our class was so small (a little less than 125 girls), there were only two Rebeccas. One of us went by Becca, me, and the other, by Becky. One afternoon I emailed my Biology teacher a question about homework and signed it, Rebecca. The next day in class, she addressed the question as being sent in by "Becky". She was searching the room for, "Becky" and even asked where "Becky" was. I looked right at her and said, "She's in the other class." She laughed and said told me I was a good joke-teller. Only then did it occur to me that she was talking about me. Fail. So in my high school years, the sisters and I got extremely close, as you can imagine, and while some who  I told to call me Becca, many of the sisters still always say, "Hi, Becky." 

       Today, once again in Biology class, my teacher called on me and called me, "Becky." While everyone else in the room exchanged questioning looks, I answered her without thinking twice. She's not the only sister here at school who refers to me as Becky. Whether I've had them in class, or have shared a pew or even worked for them as portress, I've been called Becky so many times before. I have finally deducted that it must be a nun thing. 

        I find it interesting how the sisters, without a doubt, have consistently called me Becky, even sisters in various, different communities. Many of my friends, who aren't used to calling me Becky always give me a questioning look that I just shrug off. I kind of really like being called Becky, especially if it's only by the sisters. It's just a cute, little connection, that is unique to only us. No one else can call me Becky and no one else understands how much I love it. Maybe one day, when it comes time to take my religious name, I'll tell them how much I loved it!

My Hour With The Saints

"I love Jesus Christ and that is why I am on fire to give Him my soul." - St. Alphonsus Ligouri

      Let's be real, being a full-time undergrad student, I don't get much free time or time to spend in silence or with JC during the day. That's the reason I get up every morning an hour before the rest of campus; to make sure I get at least an hour with JC. Even though He travels with me throughout the day, we chat often during those quick moments between class and work, I often feel like I'm cheating Him and cheating myself. So frequently, my heart simply desires silence. Today, on the Feast of All Saints, I got my chance.

      First let me explain that own of my many work study jobs on campus is for the Mission and Ministry part of Campus Ministry. I get the opportunity to work one on one with the sister in charge on various projects, one of which has been the glass display boxes at the main entrance of our main building. Yeah, it's a little bit of a big deal. In the past two weeks, this project has been my arch nemesis. First, we had to take out the glass shelving. I felt the fragility of each shelf throughout my whole body, afraid that at any moment they were going to crash to the floor and shatter. Then, the backing wouldn't match up to which Sister insisted I am a High J and Logical learner. Hm...I dislike math more than a lot of other things. Then, we had to put the shelving back in. I can't tell you how many times we dropped those shelves on my feet and knees. Thank God for high pain tolerance! But finally, after all our trials, we were able to finally add in some of the display. 

     Working with Sister is such a privilege because not only do we work well together, but she also knows when I need some quiet time during work. That's not saying, we don't talk to each other, but rather, she'll set me to a task that I can do on my own. Today, she set me to putting together the display and I got to spend a good amount of quiet time with the saints of my university. It was such an unique and peaceful experience to spend about an hour with the people who made my university a possibility, most of whom were sisters, and read about their experiences. It was a full trip into the history of the saints, of those who are in some way responsible for the start of my school and those who have continued the legends and traditions. According to the homily from Mass, the saints are meant to be our friends, and so, I had a beautiful date with my new friends: the saints of my university!